Wednesday, 28 June 2017
Tuesday, 27 June 2017
“What do you do as a parent, that you said you wouldn’t do?”
Do you know, I didn’t even need to think hard about my answer.
I am the Shouty Mummy.
It’s not what I had envisioned pre children, but being a parent is challenging & can test your patience to its limit! What I did (unrealistically) imagine was the calm, cool, collected Mummy who would have the answer to everything, within 5 seconds of my sparkly eyed child asking the cutest question.
The reality is, however, that being a parent isn’t filled with sparkling moments. The reality is that it’s hard work and that sometimes you lose your shit.
I lose my shit, and have done so with embarrassment. That was however before the realisation that everyone, at some point cannot actually quite maintain the ‘okay sweetheart, stop poking your sister in her eye’ pleasant almost singing tone & that at that point that Shouty Mummy comes out. Whether your a Mother, Father, Sister, Brother, Grandparent or any other version of cheerleaders that help raise children. They all have their own moments. Maybe not the same as yours, but they do. And if they say they don’t, they do.
I am not however condoning shouting or losing your shit at every opportunity. I mean, who actually wants to lose their shit. However, it is perfectly NORMAL to get caught up in the moment when you feel like you are talking to a brick wall!
It’s perfectly NORMAL to feel overwhelmed with the day and/or stressed in the moment because you’ve had 3 hours of broken sleep or the only food you’ve consumed is the leftover crust from the toast your baby neglected to eat.
So when the baby has screamed “MAAAMAAA MAAAMAAA” for the 43rd time whilst you are attempting to scramble together the food shop, then doing the under arm scrum baby hold whilst whispering FML can be the thing that stops you from having the full blown baby/toddler type meltdown in the middle of the frozen food section. Either that or the mum finger comes out wagging like a Cocker spaniel tail whilst repeating “I’m going to count to 3…”
You are honestly not the only one.
However, it can feel like you are at times. Like you’ve completely got it wrong, that your raising a monster or being a terrible Mother because you’ve shouted or lost your patience. As Mothers & Fathers we are constantly comparing ourselves to others. Especially the others who appear to have all their shit together.
Well, I am of the mind set that you do your best. You do what you can, at that moment in time because you are a frigging amazing mother/father/cheerleader & being good enough is all they need.
Perfection only gives children a screwed perception of the world, and who’s perfection are we living up to? Why do we want children who are seen & not heard?
I definitely don’t.
Each & every question, or paddy, or kick off shows me that they are developing & learning to understand the world. Each & every funny & random story Jamie & Gracie-Mae tell me, shows me how I’ve given them the space to be creative & test out the world.
So sometimes I shout, but sometimes I don’t. Sometimes I have more patience than other days. Some days I just about make the food & employ the digital nanny (Tele/iPads/Xbox ).
But that’s okay.
It’s better to not be perfect.
You are good enough & you need to give yourself a break. If you have had a shitty day, let it be just that- a day. It’s not your life, it’s not all the time. Even though it can feel that way sometimes!
And if you ever need a rant/cheerleader/moan/winge/cry/laugh…. then come over to this little corner of the Internet & leave a comment/ have a natter because the likelihood is that someone else has felt that way too!
Don’t ever feel like your in this alone.
We are all in this together.
Tuesday, 20 June 2017
Wine, wine, wine – it seems Mum's everywhere are obsessing about wine, counting down the hours & minutes to wine o’clock begging many to ask the questions why Mum's drink wine? Well if this is you…..
then it’s time to set the record straight about why Mum's drink wine….
1. It passes off as Ribena or apple juice
So that when you need to pretend that you’re not actually drinking wine when you actually are…well then, you can.
2. It reduces our chances of having a heart attack (on any given day!)
As Mum's, on some days – you know when EVERYTHING is going wrong & you’re racing around like some maniac & the kids are being utter s***s & you feel like you’re one step away from having a cardiac. Well, on these days, you can at least drink some wine & perhaps head off that stress & cardiac at the pass by knowing that drinking a little wine will in fact do your heart some good – hurrah! (ok, probably not the main reason we drink it though!)
3. The empty bottles make you feel like a rock star!
Nothing says rock star more than a recycling bin overflowing with wine bottles – well, that’s basically as close to rock star-dom any of us are likely to get to anyway.
4. It makes your crap dinner taste better
Let’s face it, when you have knocked out another disaster of a dinner for the family, you can either cry into your plate OR pour yourself a glass of wine, which will make it all taste so much better!
5. Because you don’t need to leave the house to drink it
Yup wine, our old friend, can be drunk without you having to leave your house or getting out of your stained clothes & hurrah! can be drunk with your bra off too. Best enjoyed sitting on the sofa in front of Netflix.
6. It makes us less vile
Picture the scene: Pre glass of wine = vile mood, hell on earth. Post glass of wine = happy, happy, happy without a care in the world. And a happy Mama makes for a happy household. Yup, wine is the ultimate in mood enhancers (that are legal) & stress reducers so when the day is going to crap, there’s nothing wrong with bringing wine o’ clock forward by an hour or two (judge away!). P.S. did you know that a glass of wine a day can makes you less prone to depression? And Lord knows we could all do with some help on dodging that bullet.
7. It makes all that mum guilt disappear into the ether
You know it to be true – once you’ve had a glass of wine all that mum guilt just goes…poof! & vanishes away in a puff of smoke.
8. It makes you feel sexyyyyy
Yup amazing what a transformation a glass of wine can make happen. Before a glass of wine, you probably feel about as attractive as a bucket of smashed crabs. After one glass of wine….woahhhhhh mama! You better watch out. Someone’s going to be in for a surprise when they get home. Well, you’ve got to keep the fire alive somehow, and it’s a good a way as any in my book!
9. It’s cheaper than therapy
Seriously, just think of all the things you need to get off your chest! You could go and hemorrhage money sitting on a therapist’s couch…or you could just go and pour yourself a glass of wine and take the edge off.
10. It’s the only thing that makes sleep deprivation better
If you’re acting drunk because you haven’t slept properly for days on end, well then…you might as just go ahead & be the real deal!
So there you go….if you’re wondering about whether to have a glass of wine tonight & needing any convincing….here it is.